Kids or Not:
The Ultimate Guide To Making Your Decision
Discover the right choice for you -
parenthood or staying childfree
parenthood or staying childfree
Confused and struggling to reach a decision on your own?
Full of fear and doubts?
Overwhelmed and frustrated by conflicting thoughts and feelings?
Feeling pressured or that you should have children?
And worried about making the wrong choice?
That’s understandable because it’s such a personal and complex decision that's difficult to navigate without the right guidance and tools.
The answer can’t be found from someone or somewhere external to you, only from within you, but trying to develop the necessary insights and clarity without knowing how can often result in going round in circles.
For instance, you’ve done a pros and cons list but still not figured out what to do.
That’s because it’s not about which list is longer - there’s a specific strategy you need to apply to make it effective in helping you gain clarity. Plus, it’s only one out of dozens of tools that you need to help you sort through your muddled thoughts and emotions.
And there are also many hidden forces at play that are affecting your thinking.
We’ll show you what they are and help you identify which sneaky ones are influencing you and your decision-making in the wrong direction.
Full of fear and doubts?
Overwhelmed and frustrated by conflicting thoughts and feelings?
Feeling pressured or that you should have children?
And worried about making the wrong choice?
That’s understandable because it’s such a personal and complex decision that's difficult to navigate without the right guidance and tools.
The answer can’t be found from someone or somewhere external to you, only from within you, but trying to develop the necessary insights and clarity without knowing how can often result in going round in circles.
For instance, you’ve done a pros and cons list but still not figured out what to do.
That’s because it’s not about which list is longer - there’s a specific strategy you need to apply to make it effective in helping you gain clarity. Plus, it’s only one out of dozens of tools that you need to help you sort through your muddled thoughts and emotions.
And there are also many hidden forces at play that are affecting your thinking.
We’ll show you what they are and help you identify which sneaky ones are influencing you and your decision-making in the wrong direction.
You'll get instant access to the exact 6-step blueprint needed to find clarity on your parenthood decision.
You can end your confusion and know your answer in as little as 6 days from now.
You can end your confusion and know your answer in as little as 6 days from now.
We understand how hard this decision is and how stressed you might feel. And we know the pressure to get it right is huge.
You’ve tried figuring out what to do - asking others for their opinion, seeking information from blogs or articles on the internet, even taking our quiz, but unfortunately you’re still confused - you’re not sure what you really want to do or what you should do.
In this guide you'll get professional tools and strategies thousands of others (who felt just like you) have successfully used to get unstuck and discover the right choice for them.
And it can help you too.
We'll show you how to find the clarity, peace and answers you are seeking. And we'll support you step-by-step through the decision-making process.
The 6 key steps in our guide are here to make this process easier for you and will lead you to a decision you can feel sure and confident in.
"The last two years, my boyfriend and I were in a kind of a dead end. I was deeply in love with him and our relationship was going well, but... we had THE baby issue. I was convinced that I wanted a baby and he was unsure, really unsure. He wasn't able to make a decision and we almost broke up twice. This summer, we had decided to see a psychologist. It has helped to improve our relationship, but the baby issue wasn't resolved...until we started reading your guide.
After having completed all the exercises, my boyfriend came to the conclusion that he wanted to start a family with me and that he was very comfortable with his decision. He really liked all the exercises related to his values. As I'm a psychologist, I was able to identify the theories on which some of the exercises were built. But you have done a genius work in order to transform the theory into concrete actions and changes.
Many thanks for everything. Having the chance to start a family with the one that I love is the most precious gift I have ever had"
- Annie F (Canada)
After having completed all the exercises, my boyfriend came to the conclusion that he wanted to start a family with me and that he was very comfortable with his decision. He really liked all the exercises related to his values. As I'm a psychologist, I was able to identify the theories on which some of the exercises were built. But you have done a genius work in order to transform the theory into concrete actions and changes.
Many thanks for everything. Having the chance to start a family with the one that I love is the most precious gift I have ever had"
- Annie F (Canada)
"I just finished your guide. It was excellent! I know you wrote it mostly for women, but it really helped me as a man here. It gave me the insights I so desperately needed and helped me get rid of a lot of my guilt and shame. I would not have had the courage to tell my partner without it. Frankly, I probably would have crumbled and just had a kid knowing I didn’t want it. I cannot thank you enough. Saved my life."
- Adam S (USA)
- Adam S (USA)
Will it work for me?
The 6 key steps in the guide have proven successful for the majority of women and men, and with the money-back guarantee you have nothing to lose by giving it a chance and seeing if it works for you too. We designed it to help people, so if it doesn't , we are happy to give a full refund.
Try it risk-free.
Only $37 USD
We’re so confident in the effectiveness and value of The Kids or Not Guide, and that it will help you reach your decision, that we offer a 100% money-back guarantee*
*See our FAQs for more details
*See our FAQs for more details
"I have been a fence-sitter my whole life, and recently my partner expressed her desire to start a family. I couldn't find any help through friends or the internet to answer whether I wanted children.
It was the exercises in steps 3 and 4 that helped me the most. I was never going deep enough in thinking through what it would be like to care for a child, or what it would be like to parent one with my partner. And I didn't know WHY it was that I was undecided until I got through those sections (I don't have much experience with kids!).
In the end I discovered excitement at the thought of starting a family, which I am amazed to say, knowing where I was before. On top of that I now also know that I'll be totally fine if I actually end up childfree. I can really just enjoy life.
Thank you! I have struggled SO LONG with this decision, and your guide gave me immense relief. "
- Luke R (USA)
It was the exercises in steps 3 and 4 that helped me the most. I was never going deep enough in thinking through what it would be like to care for a child, or what it would be like to parent one with my partner. And I didn't know WHY it was that I was undecided until I got through those sections (I don't have much experience with kids!).
In the end I discovered excitement at the thought of starting a family, which I am amazed to say, knowing where I was before. On top of that I now also know that I'll be totally fine if I actually end up childfree. I can really just enjoy life.
Thank you! I have struggled SO LONG with this decision, and your guide gave me immense relief. "
- Luke R (USA)
The Six Steps In The Guide
STEP 1
Figuring out who you are and what you want for your life:
- Personality type
- Strengths & weaknesses
- Values
- Life goals
- The driving purpose and individual meaning(s) of your life
- A meaningful life and/or happiness
- Identifying if your meaning(s) of life are more aligned with parenthood or a childfree future
STEP 2
Exploring how a child might change different aspects of your life:
- Evaluating your current life and how satisfied you are
- Considering how a child would impact you and the different areas of your life, and how well you would adapt to these changes:
STEP 3
Evaluating your motivating reasons for wanting a child or staying childfree:
- Identifying your motivating reasons
- Evaluating motivating reasons:
STEP 4
Other aspects that are influencing you and your decision:
- Identifying the fears, obstacles or challenges that are influencing your decision
- Fears and about parenthood or staying childfree
- Fear of the unknown
- Locus of control
- The importance of knowing your locus of control for this decision
- Dealing with anxiety and fear
- Beliefs, expectations & assumptions of parenthood vs childfree
- Questioning your beliefs, expectations & assumptions about parenthood ad living childfree
- Identifying which beliefs, expectations & assumptions are positive and negative
- External pressures and influences
- Relationship complications:
STEP 5
Making your decision:
- Considering being a single parent
- Non-traditional parenthood & other options for having children as part of your life
- Considering traditional parenthood
- Considering staying childfree
- Decision-making
- Evaluating the pros & cons, opportunities and challenges
- Which should rule - my heart, my head or my gut instinct
- Valuations of future possibilities
- Weighing everything up
- The decision-making process: breaking it down into steps
- Where to now...
STEP 6
Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision:
- Moving forward with a plan
- Dealing with fear, doubts, or regrets, if they surface
- Dealing with the opinions, expectations and pressures of others
- Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision if you choose a childfree path
- Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision if you choose to have a child/children
- Acceptance
Figuring out who you are and what you want for your life:
- Personality type
- Strengths & weaknesses
- Values
- Life goals
- The driving purpose and individual meaning(s) of your life
- A meaningful life and/or happiness
- Identifying if your meaning(s) of life are more aligned with parenthood or a childfree future
STEP 2
Exploring how a child might change different aspects of your life:
- Evaluating your current life and how satisfied you are
- Considering how a child would impact you and the different areas of your life, and how well you would adapt to these changes:
- Age & Timing
- Health – physical & mental
- Relationship health & readiness
- Leisure & time to yourself, freedom & independence
- Work/Career/Education
- Finances
- Practical aspects
- Support
STEP 3
Evaluating your motivating reasons for wanting a child or staying childfree:
- Identifying your motivating reasons
- Evaluating motivating reasons:
- 'Fear of missing out’
- 'To be happy or happier'
- ‘I’m happy with my life and/or relationship the way it is and don't want it to change’
- 'I'll be lonely when I'm old if I don't have children'
- 'It is what I was born to do'
- ‘To feel loved’
- 'I don't particularly like babies or kids'
- ‘Will I regret not having children later on?’
- ‘Feeling left out’
STEP 4
Other aspects that are influencing you and your decision:
- Identifying the fears, obstacles or challenges that are influencing your decision
- Fears and about parenthood or staying childfree
- Fear of the unknown
- Locus of control
- The importance of knowing your locus of control for this decision
- Dealing with anxiety and fear
- Beliefs, expectations & assumptions of parenthood vs childfree
- Questioning your beliefs, expectations & assumptions about parenthood ad living childfree
- Identifying which beliefs, expectations & assumptions are positive and negative
- External pressures and influences
- Relationship complications:
- My partner doesn't know if he/she wants kids, or isn't ready yet, or definitely doesn't want kids (or any more kids if they already have children from a previous relationship) OR VICE VERSA – that is, you’re the one who isn’t sure if you want kids
- I'm not sure if our relationship would cope with having a child, and/or that my partner would make a good parent, and/or I’m concerned that it would have a negative effect on our relationship
STEP 5
Making your decision:
- Considering being a single parent
- Non-traditional parenthood & other options for having children as part of your life
- Considering traditional parenthood
- Considering staying childfree
- Decision-making
- Evaluating the pros & cons, opportunities and challenges
- Which should rule - my heart, my head or my gut instinct
- Valuations of future possibilities
- Weighing everything up
- The decision-making process: breaking it down into steps
- Where to now...
STEP 6
Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision:
- Moving forward with a plan
- Dealing with fear, doubts, or regrets, if they surface
- Dealing with the opinions, expectations and pressures of others
- Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision if you choose a childfree path
- Going forward with peace and confidence in your decision if you choose to have a child/children
- Acceptance
For a small preview of the content in our guide, take a look at this article.
What if I have questions about the guide? If you're still not sure if it's right for you, or you have some questions that aren't covered here, please contact us.
What if I have questions about the guide? If you're still not sure if it's right for you, or you have some questions that aren't covered here, please contact us.
Kids or not?
Discover the best choice for you.
Discover the best choice for you.
"My thoughts and feelings about whether to have a child were so muddled and conflicted. I kept going around in circles and wasn't getting anywhere on my own. The guide gave me the missing pieces I needed to make sense of everything so I could finally see clearly what I really wanted."
- Jenna T (Canada)
- Jenna T (Canada)
Find Answers To Your Questions...
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This guide will help you answer the difficult questions you may be struggling with such as:
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